Sheltered?

Recently I have been doing research on what motivates people, especially my generation, to act when they are shown the awful things that happen in this world and the negative effects of the way we treat others and the planet. I am extremely frustrated with the apathy, and what I found in research did not make me feel better.

Media has it positives and negatives. One of these negatives is that as kids grow up in these social network, internet worlds they also apply it to their lives. In order for them to get involved the advertising has to be enticing with bright colors and uniqueness, and what is being advertised must be entertaining (Aaker 2010). Maybe that is why sex sell so well, because it is the most enticing thing to sexual beings like humans and I think it is safe to say there is nothing more entertaining than sex, in the right context of course.

Regardless, I do not understand this mentality. I have watched peoples faces as I tell them about human trafficking in America and I can see all the emotions I experienced when I first learned about it, but then nothing happens. For me, the anger, horror, and desire to see justice did not wear off. I have not been able to figure it out. What makes me different? If people admire me for my passion, why don't they strive for it as well? I had a discussion with a friend about this and she brought up the idea of desensitization. Since then I have been processing it and just like people get good idea's in the shower, I come up with cool idea's at 1:00AM.

I think this is what makes me different. I grew up in a christian home, which really means nothing. But in my home I was sheltered from the media in all of it's glory. I was not allowed to watch sexual or violent programs. At the time, it was very annoying and a bubble burster to one developing independence, but I am so grateful. I believe, because I was sheltered from those things, whenever I hear or see something violent it changes me forever. Whereas those who grow up seeing it all the time, it's no big deal and just a part of life. It gets brushed aside like a scraped knee. It's not a scraped knee! Someones arm has just fallen off and they are bleeding all over society and you just toss them a band aid as you walk by. I am sorry, but that ticks me off to no end.

I will get off of my soap box on how frustrated I am with humanity right now. Instead I would like to thank my parents for putting up with my attitude when they told me I could not watch things all of my friends were, for punishing me when I did, and for standing their ground in a culture that accepts just about anything. Because of that I have a sensitive spirit tied directly to my morals which controls the steering wheel of my heart. Because my parents "sheltered" me, I have a higher value for the gift of life and empathy for others. Mom, Dad, thank you for guarding my heart and giving me the opportunity to experience passion like I do for justice.

Aaker, Jennifer. & Smith, Andy. (2010). The Dragonfly Effect: Quick, Effective, and Powerful Ways To Use Social Media to Drive Social Change.

Inside Every Pimp's 'Hoe'

I have been reading about pimp’s lately and this issue of their ‘hoes’ choosing that lifestyle baffles me. Who in their right mind would want to have sex dozens of times a day for a profit they rarely ever see? The thing is, they aren’t in a healthy mind set. Pimps will even tell you that hoe’s have all be abused; raped, beaten by men, unloved and left by their fathers and/or boyfriends. To understand what that does to a woman you first must understand the needs of a girl.

Beyond basic needs, I believe every child needs stability, love, and the presence and involvement of their parents. Little girls though need to be delighted in. Why else do you think little girls are attracted to bright colors, sparkles, and anything that will make them stand out? They want to be noticed. They want to be lovely and beautiful. Little girls spin and twirl for their daddies, looking in anticipation for a response of adoration, love, and delight. I don’t believe this ever changes at any point in a woman’s life.

What happens when little girls don’t receive the reaction they crave from their fathers, and boyfriends later on, they can’t help but wonder ‘there must be something wrong with me.’ Right there is where the source of the loss of confidence and value for ourselves start. Unless she meets a man who can give her what she needs, out of love, not selfishness.

The girls that grow up without their needs being met, or having an event occur that compromises it, like rape, require more love than those who had their emotional needs met. They have been starved, and just like anyone who is starved, they require special care. Pimps know that. They know that these girls crave attention, love, and care. Women with these kinds of needs are so desperate for it, they will latch onto someone who they think will give it to them. That’s why pimps give them what they need because they know if they give them a little, they will get a lot from her loyalty to him. I once interviewed and ex club owner/pimp who said, “You give them the world, then take it away” when asked how he got girls to work for him. He could go to a restaurant and just from being around a girl for a few hours he could tell what her needs were, leave her with a proposition, and within a week she would be working for him. You cannot tell me that she isn’t desperate for love, attention, adoration, and needing to be delighted in. She is so hurt, but she still somehow has enough hope to search for what she needs. Unfortunately many of these women try to quench their thirst in the arms of a pimp. She doesn’t choose to be a pimp’s bitch, she thinks she is choosing for all her emotional needs to be met. Imagine the relief and the joy she must feel. She is so hungry that the little she gets from a pimp, very little, and the competition with the other girls to get his attention is what drives her. The girls don’t do it for the sex, they do it for the 5 minutes of attention they may get every so often from a pimp who is proud of her because of the profit she has brought in.  

I know that these girls don’t want to do this, we are not designed for that. Pimps know that their girls don’t enjoy the sex at all, they are there for his attention, ‘love,’ and are fighting to be delighted in.